Our life, our way

I’m not quite sure why it happens, but where ever I work, people seem to try to befriend me. They come to chat in my office and they ask me to lunch all the time. So here my problem.

I will tell them no and they ask why. It’s not that I don’t want their company…it’s because I don’t want to spend the money. Then I’m asked where all my money goes. hmmmm….SAVINGS!

Then there is also outside of work. Friends ask me to come visit them. They ask me to go on vacation. I wish I could go every time. But I can’t. Not that I can’t pay for it. I have savings…I have credit cards. There are so many that will charge anything to a credit card. I am floored by this!

People give me weird looks when I tell them what my vacation budgets are. I am very proud that I can have a vacation for a fraction of what other people pay. That means I can have more of them!

Fortunately, Brian feels the same way as I. He doesn’t think I’m cheap. In fact I think he is also very proud of me when I save us money. We get to do more trips with each other and save for our future. We have debt to pay off and if we keep up with similar spending habits a year from now then all that went to debt is now straight into savings. I feel so lucky that my husband is on the same page with me on how we will spend our money. He isn’t the best and keeping track of our budget so I handle it but I make sure he knows what I’m up to. No secrets, no surprises. We act as a checks and balance system.

So yes, we spend only 1k on Disney and stay at a value resort. If we were off to the beach then the hotel room is important as we might spend more time at it, not if we will only shower and sleep there. We would rather cruise a month before the Caribbean gets busy with spring breakers. The weather is in the 80′s in Feb and cruise prices are half what they will be March-July. So we have less heat to deal with less money spent. Sounds like a win, win to me.

So for everyone that thinks my husband and I are cheap….well, perhaps we are. But we get to enjoy more time together. We can make more memories. And we’ll be able to save for little ones when we are ready to start a family. We can buy the house of our dreams that is suitable for our whole family and lifestyle! More power to everyone that want to live pay check by check, or better yet use credit cards to make ends meet. That is not our style. There is a time for everything. If one person is laid off, we might not be as comfortable, but we would be okay. If we both got laid off then we will last for a little while before we might have to turn to credit cards. But they should never be used to supplement life unless you are about to go bankrupt or need to put food on the table. And not because you are in that situation because you are living outside of your means.

We want to be ready for emergencies. We want to be ready for life changes (good or bad). We want to be able to provide for any member of our families.

There are many things I love to do in life but I would sacrifice it all and even be somewhat sad but all would be right in the world to see that I could do something for someone I love. Why can’t everyone just stop being selfish and sacrifice for the greater good. If you love someone you will do anything you can for them which includes preventing them from sacrificing for you.

Last night we had another argument….what was the topic? Communication! Why is it so hard to just communicate. I’m obviously not expressing my thoughts clearly and Brian isn’t expressing his at all!

It all started with a problem I was having that I needed a sounding board for. I had to get up early this morning for work so I just wanted to talk through options so I could go to bed. I said, “Brian, what are we going to do? Help me talk this through and pick some options.” I said this a few times as I throw some ideas out there and I get nothing. Not even a nodding of the head. AHHHHHH!!!

So I escalate and say, I’d  like to talk now. Do you not care?

Thus, he slams his laptop and the arguement begins. We never got back around to the issue at hand. Thus I still have not had a chance to talk to him about the original problem. Its almost 1pm and he hasn’t even come downstairs. I guess I will decide what I think is best and do it with or without him.

All couples have issues and I know many are worst off than we are. Communication is key. We’re working on it.

Everyone told me that the special day will go by very quickly. Most times the bride and the groom don’t get to sit down and take it all in. “Not me” I said.

Well, why else would we have a small wedding. I wanted to be able to see everyone…talk to everyone. AND WE DID!!!

It was such a wonderful wedding. I am so proud of my family and friends for being such good sports about everything. LOL. The weather was perfect…not too hot or cold. No rain. No missing vendors. All of our guests were able to come to town minus the few that told us ahead of time that they couldn’t come. Pics and video will follow soon…as soon as we get them that is.

The morning started off pretty quiet. Felt a little weird. My family had to go to the store. I was home by myself getting hair and make-up done. It was relaxing though. Promptly at 12:30 vendors arrived as we were putting our finishing touches up. I got a call from Lauren a little later that the limo was there and they were headed over. This is when I got a little nervous. Not that they were really headed over to pick up the bride but how was everyone going to do. We really had everyone participating in the event. They were magnificent! hehehehe

I even got a joke in when Brian was putting the jewelry on. I think I fooled a few thinking Brian hurt my ear with the earrings.

After the very short tea ceremony at the house we all (minus mom and phong) headed over to the Dover rental home. I have to say, Ian did a great job decorating. Yay! Good thing Brian didn’t have to. Tea ceremony there went well. Poor Ian, he drank his tea…gave his “words of wisdom” and then got up from his chair. What about our good luck money? No worries, it was in his pocket.

Off to the venue for the “white people” ceremony. We had lots of time for pics so that was good. 5 minutes till 4pm Krista pulled us all into the reception room to wait for the moment. All guest were rounded up and sent to the back to get seated.  This is when the officiant says he is very nervous…

The ceremony was short, sweet and to the point. I think it took a total of 7 minutes according to the videographer.

Brian sealed the deal with a dip-kiss. It was perfect.

We went off to take pics with the photographer and videographer while everyone else started on horderves and cocktails. I was a little sad. I really wanted some food too. I picked it out after all. We get back right before 5pm to get ready for our introduction and the lead in to dinner. Surely all the horderves were gone! We do our amazing first dance. Yes, I said, “amazing.” LOL Everyone had good things to say. I finally sit down at my seat and Jamie, the event coordinator, had made us some plates with horderves. She then even got us drinks and our meals. Bless her heart. That was wonderful.

We started the night with a karaoke song before opening it up for dancing. Most everyone did dance but more importantly, most everyone sang a karaoke song or more. I had such a great time. Thank you to all for coming and being with us on our day!

Does anyone actually read their passport? Did anyone ever notice the part that tells you to make two photocopies before you leave home? Leave one copy at home and one with you in a different location than your passport. Hmmm….I sure didn’t.

But I remember a long time ago, someone told me to make photo copies of my credit cards front and back. You are suppose to call the number on the back if you lose it…but if you lost the card, how do you know what number to call?

So as we prepared for our first “international” travel together, I told Brian to give me his passport because I wanted to make copies of his and mine. I made two and put one set away and packed one in our suitcases. I figured it couldn’t hurt.

Never did I know that I would “lose” my passport between leaving my home and making it pass the security gate at the airport. We took a chance and hopped on the plane to FL. I mean, our luggage was on its way there anyway.  Fingers crossed, I approached the Carnival agent at the airport. It was packed and I had to wait for what seemed like forever to speak to the agent. His first question was “Do you happen to have a copy?”

Me: “yes”
Agent: “Do you happen to have it with you?”
Me: “yes!!” (the crowd of people surrounding us asked in unison, Why would you have a copy? as if I were crazy.)
Agent: “You are good to go then”

It wasn’t until later did we analyze Brian’s passport and realize that it says in your book that you should make copies and do just as I had done. I did it as a precaution but OMG, I’m so doing it everytime from now on.

So everyone that is taking a cruise or doing any kind of traveling abroad, CLONE your passport and leave copies in various places. Preferably with a family or friend that can email or fax a copy to you in case you lose your original and the copy you had with you.